Williamsburg, VA – Is Obama headed south instead of north on his vacation today? A source says “yes” and confirmed the president has moved the first family’s vacation to Colonial Williamsburg to silence his critics once and for all.
A White House spokesperson told Unsolicited Drivel, “Despite his predecessor George W. Bush having spent nearly two and a half years on vacation,* many Americans still have taken issue with President Obama and his family’s Martha’s Vineyard vacation plans which were to have started today. Not only did they not want him to take any time off after the histrionic debt ceiling fight sent stocks into the crapper, they particularly didn’t want him to do it by having a clambake with Carly Simon. So after a bit of discussion, Obama agreed that visiting a seaside playground of the rich and famous might not be in his best interest right now. We chose Colonial Williamsburg for the first family because we couldn’t think of a more patriotic, less controversial place for them to visit. Malia and Sasha plan to learn how to sew a flag with stars and bars and Michelle will learn to load a musket while they are there too! Even the Tea Party won’t be able to take issue with the choice of the Williamsburg vacation and now our staff is really looking forward to seeing the next batch of crazy-eyed photos of Rep. Bachmann uploaded to the web once the news breaks and she finds out. As another positive result of Obama’s new and improved American vacation, we also fully expect that sometime before Labor Day, we see'll at least one GOP candidate on film in Philadelphia humping the Liberty Bell. We've even started a betting pool for which candidate it will be!”
*879 Days - surpassing even Ronald (I should have moved my ranch to Hidden Valley so folks didn’t notice how disinterested I was in Washington) Reagan.
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