Tea Leaves Circling The Drain? Palin Uses Crib Notes for $100k Speech

As reported exclusively on the Huffington Post, Sarah Palin was photographed using crib notes scribbled on her left hand during her speech at the Tea Party Convention last night.  Sarah Palin, the same woman who has mocked President Obama for using a teleprompter, had the buzz words "Energy," "Tax" and "Lift American Spirits" clearly visible on her left hand, and also the words “Budget cuts,” but then the word “budget” was crossed out.  This leads us to wonder, did she have her name scrolled on her right hand?  Don’t know about how you all feel, but if we were one of the organizers behind the grass roots Tea Party movement, and paid our keynote speaker $100,000, we would expect her to spend the money on a memory chip implanted in her brain before using a Sharpie to scroll key words that you would have to be a retard not to remember.  YES, WE SAID IT!!!!!!**  Retard.  And the only reason we said it is because she refuses to rebuke Rush Limbaugh on his hateful use of the word - despite her having a child with Downs Syndrome.  For those of you who have never worked in advertising, this is all because of what we call “branding.”  Yes, Rush can ruin the Sarah Brand™.  He can do it faster than he can inhale a chili dog.  How can these Tea Baggers think this woman can lead them when she can’t even stand up for her own family?  So, as we have not been able to successfully convince anyone thus far that her true off-shoot party should be the “Tinfoil Hat Party,” we’d like to toss out a new suggestion – Sarah can lead the “Retard Party,” as clearly, she no longer thinks the word is offensive.  She can pronounce it like Zach Galifianakis did in “The Hangover,” as to not offend the mentally disabled and those who are unfortunate enough to be her spawn even further.

**Please note: the author of this article was a frequent babysitter for a Downs Syndrome child and means no disrespect to their mental disabilities.  The author does, however, have some regret at including the notion that the mentally disabled would not take offense at being compared to politicians.  My bad.