Tripoli – Despite international pressure mounting on Libyan dictator Moammar Gadhafi to step down, the heinous despot continues to rule by using an “entitled by insanity” argument for remaining in power and committing genocide.
As the conflict for democracy in the North African nation intensifies, the United States has moved its naval and air forces closer to Libya and France has committed to supplying aid to the opposition forces in eastern portion of the country in the form of cheese that will keep at room temperature. The European Union has also just proposed a Beyonce CD embargo in the hope driving Gadhafi out.
A source close to the Colonel told us, "Gadhafi has lost the legitimacy to govern in the eyes of the world, but his eyes are still camel-shit-crazy. Therefore, don’t expect him to leave any time soon. Crazy is the number one job requirement for dictators, so expect plenty more leaked videos of him carrying umbrellas indoors and rambling incoherently about people being pigs and rats, Sheens or some sort of other animal that carries disease. I know for a fact that the only sure way we could get him to give up his rule in Libya and leave without incident is if that American ABC television could promise to feature him as a contestant on ‘Dancing with the Stars’ before Kim Jong Il shimmies his way on the show. However, since they just announced their new cast for the next season yesterday, it’s obvious they filled their crazy dancer spot this time with Wendy Williams, so Moammar is out of consideration. Too bad Libya. Better luck next dictator*.”
*Who will be masquerading as a progressive reformer.
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