Viewer Would Like Ann Coulter to do Dancing With the Stars to Find Out if She’s Really a Dude

Baltimore, MD – An area man said today that he believed if conservative pundit Ann Coulter did the hit TV show Dancing With the Stars he would finally be able to settle an argument with his friends over whether or not she is really a dude.

Kevin Chambers told Unsolicited Drivel, “All these years I have never believed that a woman could be that mean and say such hateful things. I had to convince myself that she’s really a dude so my head doesn’t explode whenever I inadvertently see her.  I came up with the Dancing idea when I saw her on Joy Behar’s show last night and she accused liberals of hating black conservatives.  Isn’t that like saying I hate unicorns?  Anyway, if she did Dancing With the Stars I would finally have my answer once they paired her with her dance partner.  If they gave her Lacey Schwimmer as a coach that would prove that she’s really a dude like I thought.  If they pair her with Maksim I would still think she was a dude because they give him the partners that are tougher to manage.  Come to think of it, if she’s really a dude, it wouldn’t matter which male dance partner they put her with because the homophobic conservatives who have been keeping her secret all these years because her brand of hate speech doesn’t come easily would come out of the woodwork and protest like they did with Chaz Bono.  Hey, I think I’ll go start Facebook fan page to get Coulter on the the next season right now!”