Sunday, July 25, 2010

Worth Her Salt

This movie is exactly what you think it is: a venue for turning off your brain. Go see this stupid movie, which features Angelina Jolie as the eponymous heroine Evelyn Salt. No reason is given for the condiment-surname, although sources tell us producers considered Paprika, Pepper, and Cholula before arriving at the o-so-american spice as the name of the ass-kicking spy, played with the actress' usual big lipp-edness and sensual camera-staring-at-ness. Oh, and she kills a million bad guys, jumps from moving trucks to other moving things, and generally saves the world while hundreds of agents of the US army, FBI, CIA, Secret Service, and Russian and American governments look on helplessly. Oh, and by the way, it's official: former-agents-of-the-soviet-empire-who-want-to-return-to-communism-and-will-do-anything-to-achieve-their-goal are now the new villains-de-rigeur. Sorry Nazis! You had a good run!

Also starring Liev Schrieber as The Guy You Get When You Can't Get Liam Neeson, and Chiwetel Ejiofor as The Guy Who's Name Nobody Can Pronounce. Guest Starring Heineken Product Placements. Come to think of it, a Heineken would taste good about now. See you later!

Posted by: GMan

1 comments so far :

Laurie B. said...

We are not movie critics and aren't beholden to a media conglomerate..I will tell you I forgot it as I was watching it.

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