Friday, October 28, 2011

First Look at Lady Gaga’s Lettuce Dress

Mumbai – Vegetarian Indian animal rights activists have asked Lady Gaga to forgo a meat dress and instead wear a dress made out of lettuce while she’s in town to help kick off the country’s first Formula 1 race this weekend.

A spokesperson from Gaga’s camp told us, “Of course we never intended for the Lady to wear meat in India.  We are well aware their religion holds the cows sacred.  But PETA has already done that lettuce dress to death.  No pun intended.  Naturally, we looked to the house of Alexander McQueen for the design for this special occasion.  We didn’t want to ignore the request to wear lettuce entirely, so as you can see, Gaga’s skirt is made of romaine.  Sort of an homage to Josephine Baker and her banana dance costume.  The belt is made of chili peppers, and her tie is celery, topped off by a cherry tomato choker.   The hat looks like a plate you'd see in a deli as a little shout-out to New Delhi where she'll be performing in concert. You can’t tell because her hair is blocking the view, but she’s also wearing a coconut bra.  We just need to have a dresser on hand to spray the lettuce with water regularly so it doesn’t wilt. Hey, you don’t suppose they have any Holy water over there? Gaga was raised a Catholic.  If not, Smart Water will do.”

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