This Week in Political Foolishness: Newt Shows the Understanding of a Salamander

Newt Gingrich showed about as much understanding of the Constitution this week on both “The Daily Show with John Stewart,” and on his Twitter page as the slimy critter he’s named after…or, maybe not even that much.  And here we thought he wouldn’t be able to top himself after calling Justice Sonia Sotomayor a racist for referring to herself as a "a wise Latina woman."  In an appearance this week with Stewart, Gingrich clearly labeled the shoe bomber Richard Reid as an American, indicating his entitlement to protection under Miranda, but stated that an obvious terrorist, like the bikini brief bomber Umar Abdulmutallab, was not.  Okay, so the underwear guy is entitled to be tortured, but the shoe guy was not?  Talk about a fashion statement! Unfortunately for Newt, as we are not living in Medieval times (2004), everyone suspected of terrorism be they American, or a non-citizen, is entitled to be read Miranda before “custodial interrogation” by law enforcement.  In fact, they always were. Reid was a British citizen and Gingrich is now trying to explain his gaffe by claiming he had him mixed up with Jose Padilla, an American citizen.  British or American, we are guessing that these terrorists all look the same to Newt; hence, his confusion.  Until he can get his head straight, may we suggest that he stick to doing what he does best: being a draft dodging, adulterous, deadbeat dad, check-bouncing, corporate-owned shill?  The next time we have any questions about the Constitution, maybe we’ll just stop at our local pet shop and see what the amphibians can tell us.