Obama Pushes Tax Breaks for Middle Class

WASHINGTON, DC – In what may be a preview of this week’s State of the Union address, President Obama stated on Monday that he plans more help for the struggling middle class in the United States.  He stated, “The middle class has been under assault for a long time in this country.  Assault and battery.   Yes, we’ve basically beaten the living crap out of you for years on end.”  His new initiatives include a cap on student loan programs, and also increased childcare and eldercare tax credits, meaning that families will no longer have to first be able afford their own zip code before they can receive any of the “tax relief” like in recent years. His program also would require that many employers offer the option of work-place retirement plans, even if they are such cheap bastards that they will not match any of the contributions themselves.  Perhaps this sneak peek of the speech to come is in reaction to voter angst about the economy, a position which the middle class made loud and clear in the senatorial election in Massachusetts last week.  Obama and fellow Democrats are doing their best to regain their footing before the midterm elections next fall as polls show them losing ground and many contemplating the old  “spending more time with my family” routine. The Whitehouse insists these programs are aimed at Americans they have dubbed, “The Sandwich Generation,” or those who are sandwiched between taking care of their children and their parents at the same time.  This is not to be confused with the millions of Americans currently feeding their entire families on a “$5 Dollar Foot-Long.”