Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Mardi Gras Crowds Totally Tres Grand This Year!

New Orleans – Crowds are incredibly huge this week at Mardi Gras and the costumes remain just how they like them - teensy weensy. The days after Katrina when a just few people rolled out of the gutter at dawn to save spaces along the parade route seem like a distant memory.  “I never seen this many people,” said Ramone Beaucoudraydeauxreimi, a local parade reveler. “Y’all would think having topless women in thongs dangling blow-up penises from balconies along Bourbon Street would have been enough to have brought them back sooner, but y'all'd be wrong.  I s'pose it took the over-exposure of the bodacious bum of Miz Kim KardASSian at the Super Bowl on the TV. ” Row after row of chairs packed the insane parade route along St. Charles Avenue. One promoter, from ZuZu’s Pleasure Yourself Palace remarked, “It’s always fun to have royalty beads whipped at your head when you have a blinding headache and your depth perception is totally off so you can’t move out of the way fast enough. There will never be enough time in the day to get over a Fat Tuesday level hangover either. Even with a full belly. And in case you haven’t noticed, every single, similar, yet differently named meal we serve in this town except for sickeningly sweet beignets, could also very easily double as barf in a photo opportunity - so it’s not exactly conducive to tourists chowing down to quell an queasy stomach.  Kind of like we put a voo-doo curse on their colons.”

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