He told his friends “man, at first I thought I was going to go up there and be one of those fisherman catching crabs, but then that ‘Deadliest Catch’ show came on, so I scratched that plan. I thought it would be an easy way to escape the slow death of working in a cubicle, but it seemed like instead, it would just provide a really quick death. It’s still really cool up there with the nature and stuff, but I hear they’ve only got like one chick for every eight dudes to date, and the only ones I see on the news seem absolutely bat-shit insane. First that Sarah Palin, and now that other bitch, Senator Lisa Murkowski, the one who wants to let the oil companies get off paying less in damages than they should. I guess she can’t wrap her brain around this Gulf spill already being like worse than like twenty-five Exxon Valdez disasters and it’s still months away from being capped! What is she too groggy to get a grip because she only sleeps like six months of the year when it’s dark? Of course, that gives her plenty of extra time for running around the tundra in her Uggs begging for political palm grease from big oil. If I had insomnia for six months out of the year, and the chicks up there to date were only like Palin and Murkowski, I’d be worried I’d drown them in a bathtub filled with 10W-40 during an Ambien induced haze so they could find out firsthand what it feels like to be the other kind of Loon.”
1 comments so far :
I say, I do love a good anti-oil-company-regulation-story. Tally Ho!
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