A spokesperson for the bureau told Unsolicited Drivel, “When we hear the word ‘hacked’ we immediately think of the evil media overlord Rupert Murdoch, and of course we’d like nothing better than to finally nail his wrinkly ass to the wall and return to the days when the media didn’t manipulate the news solely for financial gain. As if that could happen! We thought about Woody Allen as a suspect as Ms. Johannson was the filmmaker’s muse for a while, but she’s probably too old for him. I doubt it was a publicity stunt either. Iron Man 2 sucked, but not that badly. And we can’t imagine that this case would be a similar scenario to that of disgraced Congressman Anthony Weiner, as we don’t think she needs to send nude photos of herself to get a guy to bang her. Except maybe if the guy was her ex who dumped her, Sean Penn. And if we find out the photos were intended for Penn we’ll suspend the investigation faster than you can say commie-pinko-America-hating-rat-bastard. But it's entirely possible the photo's just a fake. I mean her ass did her best work in Lost in Translation so in that case, wouldn't she have featured it instead of her boobs?"
0 comments so far :
Post a Comment