Ricky Gervais Bombs Across the Globe

Los Angeles – The Golden Globes is NOT supposed to be a boring awards show – after all, the stars are allowed to drink champagne during the ceremony.  However, due to the lack of surprises amongst the winners, all that was missing last night from Ricky Gervais’s return to host the 68th annual ceremony were crickets chirping between his punch lines. 

Gervais warned non-threatening-daytime-clown Ellen DeGeneres several days before the Golden Globes ceremony that his jokes would be shocking, he just left out the tidbit about them being shockingly bad.

As we believed this was the worst awards show hosting since the infamous David Letterman “Uma/Oprah” Oscars, we wondered what went wrong for Ricky and asked our media analyst for comment.

U.D.: “Good morning, Media Analyst.  As were not at all surprised by the Golden Globe winners last night, and forgot the fashions as we were seeing them,  we are left wondering about the sucktacular hosting job by Ricky Gervais.  He seemed to pull it off well enough last year, so what went wrong last night?”

M.A.: "Well, I’d say he should fire his joke writer, but I believe he wrote the jokes himself. One crack I didn’t understand was him scoffing at audiences wanting to see a Cher concert as it ‘wasn’t 1975,’ when many of Ricky’s jokes might have been more suited to 1975.  Was there anyone in the audience other than Michael Douglas or Warren Beatty old enough to even remember ‘Bonanza?’  Joking about Robert Downey Jr.’s addiction problems - from the 90s??? Charlie Sheen?  There’s no longer a joke there, as the man should be studied in a psychiatric hospital. Think about it – Ricky’s comedy has always been mean spirited, so this was not really a big surprise.  The only real surprise to me was that he didn’t slam Justin Bieber, as a good part of Ricky's bitterness might stem from the fact that he failed miserably as a young pop star. Oh, and also it was also very surprising that it took him four full minutes into the ceremony to make the Mel Gibson joke that rendered Scarlett Johansson nearly catatonic as the first presenter of the evening."