Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Courtney Love Would Like to Kill Her Husband (Again)

Singer/actress/bully Courtney Love insists that if her late husband Kurt Cobain came back to life, she would kill him for killing himself.

The famous train-wreck said in a recent interview, “I’d kill him for killing me and Frances.  I swear I would.  Right after I finished hitting fans in the their heads with microphones; verbally assaulting flight attendants; claiming credit for keeping all of my friends from od’ing; over sharing intimate details about the private parts of other guys I’ve banged; publicly defaming people on Twitter; posting lewd pictures of myself on Twitter; I’d kill Kurt.  Oh, wait!  I think I’d f**k him and then I’d kill him.  Yeah.”

When reached for comment in musicians’ heaven, Cobain stated, “I have no intention of coming back from the dead to reunite with Courtney, so it’s a moot point.  Besides, I’m dating a really nice, together girl now.  You may know her.  Amy Winehouse?”

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