The waterlogged nation told Unsolicited Drivel, “We’re never going to reach the level of aid that Haiti is receiving to help our people, and the actor Sean Penn is very unlikely to take up residence here to draw attention to our plight despite his also being a dick. We kind of thought since George W. Bush didn’t have the gumption to include us in his ‘Axis of Evil’ speech, the world, and especially America, might be able to turn a blind eye to our whole being hell-bent on acquiring weapons of mass destruction and harboring Islamic extremist terrorists thing and open their wallets, but they aren't. Our bad.”
(Is Tiger Woods schilling for Yahoo! Answers now? Man, that divorce price tag must have been steep!)
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