Monday, April 30, 2012

Van Susteren Opens Up About Lohan “Nerd Prom” Invite

Washington, DC – Fox News pundit Greta Van Susteren has been a source of criticism for inviting not one, but two tabloid darlings to the White House Correspondents’ Dinner (aka the Nerd Prom) over the weekend.  Both Kim Kardashian’s ass and Lindsay Lohan’s side boob joined Greta for the evening of lukewarm comedy stylings and self-congratulation for the formerly investigative media. 

As there is no escaping the Kardashians (much like death and taxes), their presence in Washington Saturday night was self-explanatory, but many people still wondered why Van Susteren would invite fading starlet Lohan to the actual star-studded event.

An insider at Fox News cleared up the mystery of Lohan’s presence telling us, “Greta doesn’t laugh much at these events.  Not because the jokes aren’t funny because they are always written by liberals, but because she can’t move her face.  She got tired of being the only stone-faced person at her table, so she needed somebody as jacked up on botox as she was.  After seeing Lindsay’s non-emoting face on the recent episode of Saturday Night Live, she became an obvious choice for an invite. However, Greta’s first choice of a fellow stone-faced dinner companion was actually Taylor Armstrong of the Real Housewives franchise, but unlike Lindsay Lohan, amazingly enough Taylor is employed so she couldn’t get away.”

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