Sunday, April 18, 2010

God to Limbaugh: STFU

God confessed over this weekend, that even for someone who is all-knowing, he doesn’t understand what the f*#k is wrong with Rush Limbaugh. Limbaugh came out on his radio show this past Friday and asserted that the volcano eruption in ICELAND was God’s angry response to the passage of the health care bill in the UNITED STATES. 

Limbaugh made this comment in response to President Obama’s dismissive tone when the Earth didn’t open up and swallow him whole after his signing of the health care bill.

The Almighty stated, “you have to take the good with the bad when it comes to this job. There are certain things I love to take credit for creating, like nature, pizza and the iPhone, but there others I wish I didn’t have to own up to, like Limbaugh, for example. I don’t have the time to analyze what’s going on underneath those fat folds and inside his thick cranium. Why would I make Iceland suffer for something that happened in the U.S.?  Isn’t it enough that I made their climate so bizarre that it makes their citizens want to get drunk 24/7? Why the hell would I object to President Obama’s efforts to help me heal people? Do you know how many prayers I have sitting in my in-box I have yet to answer? And, wouldn't I have a volcano erupt in the U.S. if I were really that petty? Mt. St. Helens is probably over due.  Or, I could have caused an earthquake on Pennsylvania Avenue with the snap of my fingers. But I suppose to consider that Mr. Limbaugh would need to use logic. I hate it when man doesn’t use the gift of reason I so graciously gave him. I probably should have just made Rush a garden slug. Perhaps it’s time to plague him with throat polyps? I’ll put it on my to-do list.”

2 comments so far :

katie said...

p.s. you do realize that one of your Google ads is for palin's PAC, right?

Unknown said...

This had me laughing out loud! I could picture god saying those exact words about dear old Rush. Great post UD! :-)

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