Los Angeles – Formerly funny, then serious, then action star, actor Nicolas Cage, is slowly digging his way out of a $13 million debt to the IRS (with a jewel-encrusted spoon once owned by Henry VIII) after hiring an accountant with all of the brain power of maybe a lemming who took Nic along with him sailing over a fiscal cliff.
Unsolicited Drivel spoke with the vaguely creepy actor and he told us, “Uhhhhhh it’s like, true. I paid the IRS back $600,000 this year. It’s tough though because I don’t know if you’ve heard, but I like to spend a bit of money. I had to have the Home Shopping Network blocked from my cable. I have exercised some restraint though. Hey, I didn’t buy that really cool chandelier made out of Cro-Magnon men skulls I wanted, the actual Bugatti car that exotic dancer chick Isadora Duncan nearly snapped her head off in from the 20s, the Giant Panda comforter I wanted for my waterbed, a weather machine, or the flock of African penguins that I thought would look totally rad hanging by my salt water pool. The good news is I’ve got a ton of film work lined up to get the G-men off my back. Fans can look forward to Kick-Ass 3,4,5, & 6. Then Ghost Rider 2: Still Totally Out for Vengeance and Even More Flaming. Travolta and I are thinking about making a sequel to Face-Off, only this time we would switch brains. We might bring back Con-Air and have the inmates parachute off while crashing the plane into the villainous Goldman-Sachs building to keep in tune with America's troubled financial times...which I can soooooo relate to. And I’m also doing National Treasure 3 where we finally find that President Obama dude’s birth certificate.”
Monday, November 19, 2012
Nicolas Cage Slowly Less Caged in by Tax Debt
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Posted by
Laurie B.
at
5:11 PM
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fiscal cliff
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Nicolas Cage Tax Debt
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2 comments so far :
I'm in for a Face Off sequel Nic. I gave up my brain years ago when I joined the Church of Scientology.
I heard he tiled his bathroom with cobra teeth.
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