It’s Okay to Look In the Mirror and Ask “Will You Be Mine?” on Valentines Day

US of A – All of this week we will be reminded by the media and those who sell flowers and chocolates that Valentine’s Day is just around the corner.  Single people get tired of being the butt of jokes this time of year. Especially when married people are much more likely to have big butts which are more appropriate joke fodder in the first place. It’s time to dispel the Hallmark notion that contentment can only be brought about through a blissful union. Singlism is discrimination plain and simple. Discrimination is always unfair, but particularly because we usually don’t take the time to get the facts straight. Let’s dispel some of the myths about our friendly neighborhood singletons so they can enjoy the upcoming holiday too!



1. Single People Are Sadsacks – Studies that governments actually fund offer comprehensive findings about married people being happier and living longer. Truth be told, single people are happier as they don’t have to stick to any rigid, structured schedule, enabling them to stick it rigidly to a wide variety of fun and interesting people.



2. Single People Are Self-Absorbed – A study in the Connubial Quarterly found that adult siblings who were married and those who were single bore no distinction in the amount of help they gave to caring for their ageing parents. The study also concluded that the married siblings were much less likely to offer a kidney to a single sibling, and even felt no obligation to prove to Mom and Dad that said sibling was a flaming a-hole in their justification for the total dis.



3. Single People Have Low Self-Esteem – You would think that all singles would be insecure but that’s just not always the case. Society offers them lots of alternative resources (friends, careers) to have fun and many of them take advantage by having alternative relationships. There’s much less pressure to take the traditional route of marriage and children these days, and with the advent of cell phones, there’s much less chance that if these singles have cats instead of children, that they’ll get eaten by them because they’ve collapsed on the apartment floor before being able to dial 911.



4. Single People Have Really Got it Tough – Not long ago, people counted themselves lucky if they had a huge extended family and there was always room for quirky Aunt Meg at the dinner table even if it wasn’t a holiday. Not so any more. People count themselves lucky if they can fit themselves, their spouse, and their invitro-wonder-spawn into a breakfast nook in a condo downtown. The anxiety about the high level of divorce may also contribute to some singles making the decision to stay single. The cult of the couple has become just that: a cult. Being single is still easy, figuring out a way to slip cyanide into a martini and later still collecting on the life insurance; that would be hard.

So, this Sunday, treat yourself to a Schittmann Chocolate Sampler. Remember, self-love is the biggest hurdle for commitment-phobes of all!