God to Limbaugh: LOL

Heaven – God reported that as he was having his breakfast this morning (of eggs and Heavenly Ham), he was wondering why he hadn’t been bombarded some with insane ranting accusation from Rush Limbaugh yet over the Gulf of Mexico oil spill.  Then Jesus opened his iPad and he realized that notion was too good to be true.

Limbaugh stated on his radio show that the devastating oil spill was a result of sabotage by “environmentalist whackos,” in some sort of "message" to the drilling advocates on Earth Day.

The Almighty stated, “well, at least he didn’t accuse me of trying to wipe out living creatures in Louisiana and Mississippi.  The federal government already does a bang-up job of that.  Don’t worry, there’s a special place in Hell reserved for them.  I hear Satan’s already got an entire wing reserved just for the Bush and Cheney families.  But I happen to know that people who are trying to save wildlife wouldn't kill it.  That would be too ironic and I didn't give those people a sense of irony when I created them.   And I apologize that I haven’t gotten around to plaguing Rush with throat polyps yet. My bad. But between leading little girls out of Florida swampland unscathed among a multitude of other tasks, I’m pretty busy.  So, I suppose I’m going to have to ask you followers to just stop listening to Limbaugh’s show, because if you recall, I’m not a fan of liars.  Or, if anyone knows a person on his staff, please feel free to convince them to put Drano in his coffee.  I'll vouch for them at the pearly gates."

UPDATE: News is breaking that Halliburton is likely to blame for the disaster.  Dick Cheney is definitely going to Hell.  Like there was any doubt?