Thursday, August 5, 2010

A Very Bad Day for Bigots

U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker overturned the California voters’ ban on gay marriage known as Proposition 8 yesterday ruling it was unconstitutional.

Not surprisingly, conservative groups across America (who only want Constitutional rights for religious white people) have slammed the judge’s decision (condemned him to burn in Hell) and have vowed to appeal it.

Former House speaker (and adulterer) Newt Gingrich called the decision "an outrageous disrespect for our Constitution" and also used it as another opportunity to insinuate Supreme Court Nominee Elena Kagan played softball one more time before the Senate votes on her confirmation today.

However, as any rational person knows, a judge has a legal obligation not to let which team he or she plays for affect their lawmaking decisions. 

Some interesting tidbits about Chief Judge Vaughn Walker:

1.    Judge Walker is gay.  Despite the fact that he remained impartial*, we are sure this dooms him to double hell fire as dictated by conservatives.
2.    Judge Walker represented the U.S. Olympic Committee in a fight AGAINST the Gay Olympics.  This opposition kept him off the bench for two full years after he was appointed.
3.    Judge Walker was appointed by Ronald Reagan!!!

We asked one courtroom observer about the proceedings and he told us, “It wasn’t like Judge Walker just ruled that gay people have a constitutional right to be as miserable as straight people like you might think.  In fact, quite the contrary.  They actually proved in the trial that marriage adds value to people’s lives, and the last time the court checked, lesbians and gays were people and we still protect those under the Constitution.”

*If conservative opponents took the time to read Judge Walker' 136-page opinion, they would know that.  Yeah, like that will happen!!

1 comments so far :

Anonymous said...

Newt is a good name for a man who wants us to live in pre-civil rights days. What a jerk

Post a Comment

opinions powered by