LeAnn Rimes’ Engagement Ring Tour Announced

It’s been only four short days since country crooner LeAnn Rimes has announced her engagement to “CSI: Miami” eye candy, uh, actor, Eddie Cibrian, but she’s already exhausted, and on the edge of going to rehab for exhaustion,  from showing off the ring by fondling her fiance.

The 5-carat oval sparkler, believed to have been designed by ostentatious jewelers to the stars VanCreep and Arpuke, is set in a rose gold fleur-de-lis band and is worth more than $85,000, or one sixteenth the cost of a good Hollywood divorce lawyer.

A source close to Rimes told us, “LeAnn is over the moon for sure.  Her relationship with Eddie sends an important message to adulteresses everywhere that sometimes, married men really DO leave their wives.  It helps if they have such a sense of self-importance that they don’t care if the ex-wives are arrested for DUI shortly thereafter.  Anyway, over the last few days of showing off her ring for the media, LeAnn believes she’s started to develop carpal tunnel syndrome and she can’t write new music if she’s in that much pain.  So, we decided to send the ring out on tour by itself for fans to enjoy in person.  Taylor Swift may have a diamond-covered guitar, but she damn sure ain’t got one of these!  Did I mention tickets are still readily available?”