Polls Show America Could Go Either Way on Obama in 2012

Even though we are too far away from the 2012 election for polls to be worth a crap, Americans polled after two years of an Obama presidency, show they are clearly split on voting for him again. 

Those surveyed by media outlets of other than Fox News, surprisingly showed only a 51% positive response as to whether President Obama deserved a second term.

The results were largely similar to a poll posted a year ago, and poll results from surveys conducted when Obama was just a glimmer in his father’s eye.  Future poll results are likely to be similar and serve as no predictor of the outcome of the 2012 election as well.  But that will not stop polling agencies from conducting polls. 

Among the list of likely Republican contenders, former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee had the lead at 21%, but only among people who do not believe in dinosaurs, former fatties/recovering Hush Puppy addicts, and fans of another puppy, the Hanna-Barbera cartoon, “Huckleberry Hound.”

Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin came in second in the poll at 19%, but primarily among those voters who were solely interested in fantasizing about what it would be like to bang her in the Lincoln Bedroom, provided they could get Tracy Morgan’s comments about banging her out of their heads.

Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney came in at 19%, but only among voters who are fans of sketchy religions made up by criminals, and those who approve of tying their pets to the roofs of their cars while on vacation.

Among adulterous, draft-dodging, corporate shill voters, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich earned a respectable 10%.

Texas Congressman Ron Paul garnered 7%, but only among voters who forgot that he sired Rand Paul.