Republicans Solve America's Problems With World's Biggest Yard Sale

Starting with the State of Utah, which has decided to sell itself to solve its debt problems, can the rest of the country be far behind?

Utah Governor Gary Herbert said "The solution is simple: once we sell the whole state, it won't technically exist anymore, so voila! - bye bye debt."  What about the people living in it? "Well, most of them don't have jobs anyway, and are about one inch away from being homeless, so why would they want to stick around in the new State of PomWonderful, or Dubai Importers, or whoever buys it, when they're probably just going to be evicted as squatters anyway."  Unsolicited Drivel mentioned that that didn't sound too charitable for down-on-their-luck Utahns, prompting the Governor to add, "Of course, once the 13th amendment is repealed, perhaps our dispossessed citizens might enjoy a new career in the indentured servant trade wrapping toilet paper on spindles for the Koch Brothers. The bidding on e-Bay is expected to start at 50 billion dollars, or 40 billion if the buyer agrees to supply rainflaps for the tent citiess where most of Utahns are expected to live."