Actor Alec Baldwin is Ranting Again

So this is worth a re-post.  Currently the man who knows everything (just ask him) made an alleged racial slur.   Please stick to collecting trophy wives and insulting your own family like a normal rich asshole Alec.  And I'll  stick to thinking about banging your cuter brother - Billy!  Thanks!

Love,
The Drivel Lady

And just so your brother doesn't feel left out:

Trump Deletes Tweets, Yet Sadly, Refuses to Delete Himself

You gotta pwoblem wit me?

NY, New Yawk - Self proclaimed King of the USA, Donald Trump, quickly deleted some of the Twitter messages he put up after President Obama's reelection this week.

Trump, who admittedly doesn't drink, can still behave like the biggest asshole in America and APPEAR to be drunk with ease somehow every time he opens his mouth.  He also accomplished this by having his wife (secretary of the luxury condo tower) Tweet with her French manicure, "Well, back to the dwarwing board!"  And something like "This countwy is now a twavesty!!"  He also admitted that he felt Mitt Romney didn't connect with most Americans, like for example, "the blacks," with whom he has a great relationship, but also failed to notice that most of his help is Latino now and Snoop Dog (Lion?) only hangs out with him when he's stoned.  Like he's outta his zone, mon!

We wondered why someone as outspoken as Donald Trump is would take back his words of criticism?  Our current staff historian told Unsolicited Drivel, "Well America's always in need of having at the very LEAST one major asshole and Trump has been willing to fill that bill.  Tough job, but he delivers.  Especially when you consider how it would be so easy for Rush Limbaugh to OD or Bill O'Reilly to be a victim of spontaneous human combustion.  Trump also gets less D-List celebrities on his TV show than Dancing With the Stars.  Be that as it may, and even though former Senator Todd Akin challenged the Donald for the title of 'America's Biggest Asshole'…well, if you know Donald and I do, he doesn't like losing.  Yet he still toned down his Tweets for the time being and had Melania delete some.  Also, it's he likely calmed down a bit when the president sent him his college transcripts via a bald eagle courier that damn near scratched clean off whatever that thing is that lives on his head when it landed."

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One American States: Koch Brothers Should Switch to Selling Cocaine

Not the REAL Kochs, but how we assume they look...

Washington, DC - One American insisted recently that the Koch brothers, Charles and David, who typically sell products to wipe your ass (toilet paper), would probably do the nation more good by selling something that matched the pronunciation of their name - coke - (aka) cocaine.

An associate of theirs that works at the Libertarian affiliated Cato Institute told Unsolicited Drivel, "Hey, if we had any idea that the Tea Party would end up to be filled with a bunch of lard-ass, assassins of the English language AND Michele Bachmann, I'm pretty sure Chuck and Dave would have thought twice about being the chief financial backers.  They can spell and even string sentences together despite being just professional inheritors.  In fact,  now they have decided to just stick to voter intimidation at their paper plants (even if everyone can't speak English), and the various other b'jillion industries they still own which enable them to try to brainwash the American public at will.  Funny story…I'm only working at the Cato Institute because I was busted for doing coke and couldn't become a lawyer!  Four years of snorting blow through college because I'm not cool in real life down the drain.  Plus, I still have to hang out with cement heads everyday…which is EXACTLY like having a coke hangover.  All things considered, I wish the Koch brothers would actually switch to selling coke. How great would that branding be, baby?!?  They could still sell plenty of tissues from their paper plants and everyone in the Tea Party might seem more intellectual.  Except for Bachmann, of course."

Lone Black Listener of Rush Limbaugh’s Show Going to Quit That Bitch

Phoenix, AZ – The only black person in America listening to Rush Limbaugh’s radio show was recently revealed to be Mr. George Martin of Phoenix and he has confirmed in regard to the right wing blowhard’s show that he’s going to “quit that bitch.”

Limbaugh has been making comments recently regarding the controversial shooting of innocent black teen Trayvon Martin, insisting that the huge amount of media coverage is all to aid in President Obama’s reelection efforts.

Unsolicited Drivel uncovered Mr. Martin’s outrage while trolling the Rants and Raves boards on Craig’s List. He told us, “I initially tuned in to Rush’s show because I’m a dyed in the wool sexist. I can’t get enough of that Feminazi talk.  And I love the word 'slut.'  But I was under the impression that Rush had moved on to exclusively hating on the Mexicans now. Just like I am. But these latest comments about the Trayvon case and brothers in general, make me want to quit that bitch - for good. Besides, Obama doesn’t have to use that black child’s tragedy to get re-elected! He’s whiter than Limbaugh is.”

Honey, I'll Be a Little Late Tonight

I've even seen motorists reading and watching DVDs.  WTF?

(Link)