Rush Limbaugh WRONG on Ricin Poisoning Suspect Arrest

New York – Increasingly mentally unhinged and advertising revenue lacking broadcaster Rush Limbaugh has insisted that the only reason the government arrested Ricin poisoning suspect Paul Kevin Curtis… is because he hails from Dixieland.  Yes, you read that correctly.

Unsolicited Drivel contacted a sheriff’s deputy down in Lee County, Mississippi for comment.  The officer, who chose to speak anonymously, told us, “Mr. Curtis was arrested because of some mighty fine policin’ alright, alright.  Anybody who can get access to the Internets can figger out how to make that rice krispies poisoning. They can do it in the libbery if they still have one and have a hobo read them the instructions.  We arrested the suspect, Paul Kevin Curtis, ‘cause he got three names.  That told us one thing little lady – serial killer.  Also, we had to put an end to his career as an Elvis impersonator.  Curtis ain’t got no rhythm in his hips. That’s the most shockin' thing about that boy bein’ from the South y'all!”