Aromatherapy Averts Holiday Shopping Homicide

Saginaw, MI – Ahhhh….aromatherapy. The term originally coined by French chemist René Maurice Gattefossé to describe the practice of using essential oils to cover up the putrid funk that can only be derived from lack of bathing, has since fortunately also caught on in the states.

One local shopper found this came in handy during the holiday rush last weekend. Katie Bobb offered, "I was waiting for what seemed like hours in line to pick up my NEW Xbox 360 250GB with Kinect Sensor at Circuit Circus. There was this real skank in line ahead of me, and when he got to the counter, I unwittingly touched the railing he had just been pawing with his Skoal-enhanced saliva covered mitts.  Fortunately, I had my Vanilla Bean Bergamot Mint Anti-bacterial hand lotion in my pocket that I had just picked up from Bedhead, Buttwax and Beyond. I slathered it on and was so enjoying the calming combination of scents that I was able to quell the violent tendencies I would have typically had towards him once he started arguing very abusively with the sales clerk and the voices in his head, and then attempted to pay for his Garmin with food stamps. There seems to be more and more scientific support for the healing power of aromatherapy these days. I’m just glad it gave me the strength not to support him by inserting my heel up his grungy ass.”